August 27: Final Post

I truly intended to make several posts before concluding this blog, but things couldn't be helped. I made the most of my last few days in El Salvador, finding myself far too busy to relay the experience via blog. Furthermore, as soon as I returned to the United States, I found myself overwhelmed by my duties as a Student Ambassador for my university, assisting in the Freshmen Orientation. That has all concluded successfully, and with my first day of classes out of the way, now seems like the perfect time to close the last chapter of my life as I open a new one.

On August 16th, Connie's family invited Gerardo's family and me to a farewell dinner/party, one of the most enjoyable events I have ever been to out of social courtesy. I discovered that I really like the taste of rum and Coca Cola together, but much to the collective group's disappointment, I understand my body well enough to avoid getting drunk. Ernesto made quite the primo bartender! Connie and her mother prepared a delicious dinner for everyone, and I got to meet Connie's half-brother and sister, both of whom were attending university in France but also spoke English pretty well. The night ended around 1 am after many toasts, speeches, and pictures.

August 17th was the last full day I spent in El Salvador, and I made the most of it. I went out for ice cream with Gaby for an hour (she had family obligations which limited our last date together) and then we said our goodbyes. Shortly after she left, Mr. Worldwide came to Gerardo's house and joined the family and Connie in a final evening together. We all played Uno together for a while, eating pupusas and tamales, until everyone went to bed, giving myself a chance to finally pack while Gerardo spent his last waking hours in El Salvador conversing with his best friend. That is how the night ended.

August 18th, our departure date, was full of heartbreaking and teary goodbyes, particularly from Andrea. Since coming to college, I have traveled to Italy, Belice, and El Salvador without reservations or hesitations; I have many people that I care about, but no one that could possibly quell my desire to broaden my horizons. Gerardo's burden is completely alien to me. What must it be like to repeatedly reassure your eight-year-old sister who is bawling into your chest that you will see each other in no time? To look your girlfriend in the eyes at every spare second and not have it be awkward at all because they will be the last for many months? To leave behind such a young family in a culture that is so interdependent and connected? I was excited and melancholic at the thought of returning home, but my heart was heavy for the people that had taken such good care of me and become my family so easily. Just as my journey began, it ultimately ended with Gerardo and me joining up with Mario and Adri at the layover airport before we finally landed in Little Rock. Our bags all went missing, but they were recovered later the same day. My English advisor and Gerardo's boss Dr. Strain came and picked us up at the airport, treating us to a delicious dinner at an Americanized Chinese restaurant before we finally returned to the university. Things are now once again normal.

Question: I had one question in regards to El Salvador from the lovely Kim Cook: How does El Salvador compare to the US in regards to environmental issues; such as the push to conserve resources, recycle, the government offering incentives etc.?

Answer: In my experience, it is far less noteworthy. Pollution isn't really a notable issue in a place like Santa Tecla, but in the more impoverished areas, trash is littered all over the place. Both my high school and college have recycling programs to save paper, aluminum, and glass. In the nearly two months I was in El Salvador and with all of the places I travelled, I did not see a single instance of a push to recycle. A few programs exist in the country of course, but while the US has the luxury of being the producer of the dollar and one of the world's superpowers, El Salvador is primarily concerned with improving the economy and it is difficult to make recycling profitable. I believe littering is more heavily penalized, but that is all that is really done to discourage wastefulness.

Goals: In my first post, I listed what I hoped to accomplish during my stay in El Salvador. As a refresher, I have posted them below. I am happy to say that I succeeded in most of my goals as well.

Proficiency with the Spanish language - I have gained confidence in my Spanish, and although I am still limited to present and past tense verbs, I have grown better at speaking. Connie and Gerardo's parents both acknowledged as much.

Greater empathy for Central Americans - Obviously I have become more familiar with the dangers and issues that Central Americans have to cope with, but what surprised me is how much I was able to empathize with them in regards to the painful past they had at the hands of the United States' actions.

Experiencing the real El Salvador that citizens of the United States can never know just from reading a book or watching a movie - I went all over the country. I undoubtedly saw the real El Salvador.

Community service or volunteer work - This is the one goal I did not accomplish, much to my sadness. Without technology, connections, locational knowledge, etc., my actions were very limited.

Appreciation for the culture and customs of Salvadorian residents - Culture-wise, I actually prefer El Salvador to the United States. They actually have a sense of identity that the US, as a mixing pot of diversity and culture, lacks. If I had actually been born and raised in El Salvador though, there is no telling how the culture and customs would affect me. Would I still like it, or would I feel like it limits me? With my complex mindset, there's no telling.

Making memories that will last a lifetime - This was the most obvious perk of the trip. The people I met, the places I saw, the things I experienced, they will stick with me forever. This blog is a testament to what I saw, but only I will retain how intense the experience was.

Shedding a few pounds - I was extremely and pleasantly surprised at the success of this goal. When summer started, I weighed 223 lb, the most I have ever weighed in my life. I worked out every day during the month that Gerardo was in summer school, and managed to bring myself down to 216 by June 10. I didn't exercise that much in El Salvador, but the food was so much healthier and natural that I lost a ton of weight. Weighing myself today, I am at 201 lb for the first time since high school. Maintaining and lowering that weight will be an important goal for me this semester.

The Good and the Ugly: I experienced a lot of great things in El Salvador, but there were a few unpleasant things that I kept on the down-low so I wouldn't freak people out until I was safely back in the States. Here are the memorable things about El Salvador.

• Gaby: What guy doesn't dream of a summer romance with a gorgeous girl in a foreign country? Doesn't look like things will work out between us now that I'm back in the States, but we made some great memories together.
• Millionaire: I completely forgot to mention this, but we were invited to a dinner party by Karla's aunt. As it turned out, she had inherited somewhere between three and four million dollars a long time ago, so she was the first millionaire's home I had ever been inside. It wasn't really much different than any other house in El Salvador; she keeps things pretty humble, but the area that it was located in was one of the safest.
• Primera Pupuseria: I already mentioned this in one of my earlier posts, but in retrospect, this was the first solid dive I took into Salvadorian culture. If spaghetti is representative of Italians, Hamburgers for the US, and Tacos for Mexico, then pupusas represent El Salvador. Sounds stereotypical when I put it that way, but it really is an important part of Salvadorian culture and I was really happy to experience it.
• Earthquake: On July 7th, I experienced my first earthquake. That might be a little bit of an exaggeration; there wasn't any damage and it was really low scale, but it was my first time actually feeling one. I wasn't even afraid, but in retrospect, it was fortunate that things worked out in the end.
•  Kidnapping: Just one day after the earthquake, a nearby neighbor was kidnapped, presumably by a Salvadorian gang. We heard screaming from Gerardo's house and a loud commotion, and the cops were investigating all night. It's pretty scary to think that happened so close.

Back in the States: Now that I have been back in the States for eight days, I can reflect a little bit over what I took with me from El Salvador and how my perception has changed. The very first thing that startled me after returning was how wide the roads are. I was staring down the Interstate the entire ride back to campus, marveling at how there were only a few cars in sight with tons of room in between us. The straight roads with trees lining up the sides...it greatly contrasted with the rough Salvadorian roads that were constantly overcrowded with dangerously reckless drivers. Even though I never drove while I was down there, I still find myself tempted to push a stop light when I see it about to change green, even though it is more common here to wait for the lights to change. Got a reckless mindset in a spacious area...

Furthermore, I still have a few Spanish words that come out of my mouth more frequently than the English counterparts. "Gracias," "lo siento," and "hola" are a few of the common ones. It doesn't sound big, but I actually have to stop and think now before I speak English for the little and more common phrases, a phenomenon I honestly am surprised by. Words of social courtesy ended up being more important than I expected in El Salvador, particularly when I didn't know what else to say, so I fell back on them a lot.

As far as food goes, I have somehow managed to adjust back into the Americanized food that I was originally accustomed to. I have some healthier quirks now, primarily out of my desire to avoid gaining back all the weight I lost, but also thanks to El Salvador's influence. For example, I try to frequently eat a salad...wait for it...WITHOUT salad dressing! Not exactly delectable to me, but it's an effort that I will maintain for as long as possible. And although I have had Arby's three times since coming back, I am doing surprisingly well by my standards. The first time was as soon as I came back and the last time was just because a midday nap caused me to miss dinner. My logic leads me to conclude that only one of those visits was unjustified...and I have made the effort to break these unhealthy habits, so all that's left is to see where it all takes me.

Probably the biggest shock for me is simply having social obligations again. I haven't even finished getting my room organized...and we already have homework assignments starting to stack up. Finishing this post will end this blog which will be one less item from my to-do list, but at the same time, closure brings with it a sense of nostalgia and melancholy. Gerardo made the observation the other day that this blog focused a lot on the physical aspects of my trip, but it lacked the depth of my own personal thoughts and feelings. I think that in the end, this blog was more for my sake than for the readers'. If I can remember the places that I have been, the people that I have met, and the things I have experienced, I won't forget how I felt about them, and that is enough for me.

Final Analysis: June 22 - August 18. I spent 58 days total in El Salvador, a great act of faith as well as a stupidly reckless decision. I learned so much about myself as I saw the world through different eyes. My desires to learn Spanish and experience other cultures has only been intensified, and I am redoubling my efforts this semester to broaden my horizons. I'm not particularly religious, but I know God has big plans for me, and when stacking this summer against all that have preceded it, this was definitely one of the best. I believe that in time, I will look back on my adventures as a stepping stone that will lead me to even greater things, but for now, I look at it as another experience of someone who wanted to feel alive and found it by getting swept up by the lifestyle of another group of people. It has been a pleasure writing this blog, and I hope to dedicate myself to another in the near future.  Many thanks to all my readers and, of course, to all the people I met in El Salvador that kept me fed, watered, sheltered, and happy. And now, I shall end this final post with my typical farewell signature, but this time, for the benefit of those of another mindset, I will top this post off with two words rather than one. Pay attention now. This little phrase has become my greatest philosophy in life and it would be a shame to have read this entire blog and not understand what "one" refers to.

One Love.